You never do what you're told

I'm having another one of those self-hate days, which hasn't happened in awhile. I spent an hour cleaning and blasting music as loud as I could to try to drown out my thoughts. I feel like I screwed up something and I'm really hoping I didn't.

I don't have much to say today. My parents splitting is taking a huge toll on me. I love that they're both open with me but I sometimes wish they didn't tell me the things that were going on. I hate it when my mother calls me and tells me I need to do something a certain way or my dad will have more fuel against her, or when my dad sits there and goes on and on about how my mother is a horrible parent, yadda yadda. Then they wonder why I spend the day in my room.

i miss you <3