In all the right places

How many times do we hold our breath? We close our eyes, we sleep, we depart. Our souls are free of restriction. We sing, we dance, the universe available in our hands. We kiss the sky, breathe in the warmth of knowing all is well, we're going in the right direction, and we're constantly surrounded with love.

Our bodies are heavy with fear, pain, loss, anger, but our hearts stand through it all, constantly keeping us connected no matter how distant we are.

I love you <3

You've never seen a face so unfamiliar

I don't really like thinking "What if..."

It seems like now with every situation that arises, I imagine it as if certain things never happened in my past. What if things went a different way? How would I react if I was in that place instead of my current one? It's a difficult thing to think about, really. I wish I could let go of the past. Sometimes I feel like I hold onto it so much that it's keeping future possibilities out. I'm still not sure about something and I wish that I could just have the answer handed to me. I'm having a hard time right now. I mean, really, life is doing good. I'm trying to try harder in school and I have great friends, but something isn't right mentally/emotionally. I'm not quite there yet, if that makes sense.

I'm seeing people differently. I have a hard time seeing them for their looks or personality. I've realized I'm really thinking hard about people, thinking of them as a soul instead of this body they're working in. I keep thinking of all of us as just souls that are learning. We've made so many mistakes, but that's our purpose.

I find it hard to grasp that part of our purpose is to make mistakes, to get hurt. It's hard to think that things that I have been through are all a destined part of my creation.

I'll have a gigantic blog tomorrow because it's a big day. For now, I'm annoyed with a cold sore, I feel like I can't get my thoughts out correctly, and it's too dark in the living room.

Goodnight.