I feel like a failure

I hate the feeling that I've let you down. Please forgive me. Maybe I'm not trying hard enough... I know I'm not. Why am I lying to myself so much? Why am I resorting back to old thoughts and ways. I feel like giving up, I really do. I tried really hard for awhile and it's getting me NOWHERE. I can't concetrate and I'm screwing myself up. Yes, this post will likely be full of self pity and I don't care. People are pissing me off so easily now and I don't want to be around them at all. Getting out of bed each morning is becoming more of a chore, like it used to be. I feel like my reasons for living have either left me, or are losing faith in me. I guess I really need God's help to heal past wounds and lead me down the right path because as of right now I kinda want to smoke my life up.

I'm beyond sorry. I never want to fight with you again. The feeling I was left with made me feel so sick, knowing you were upset. I love you.

Yeah, I'm kind of giving up on you. I gave you several chances to change your mind. I have more important people to care for now. Have fun with your 'friends'

I'm so incredibly happy that we are able to push our past aside and get along so well. It's great to know you're always there and you make my days burst with sunshine!

I still miss you. A lot. Where ARE you? Please try to contact me? I feel too pushy when it's me trying.

I love you and I miss you everyday, angel.


On the plus side, Obama won, yay yay yay! Goodnight, comment, whatever <3